Newsletter Excerpt: Nothing’s Gonna Change My World

Written By: Virginia Blair

Happy end of Q3 everyone! I hope you have enjoyed this edition of our newsletter with all of the interesting inputs from our team and goings-on with our staff, events, etc. The theme of this particular newsletter is one of my favorites – resilience. And I had the perfect prompt pop up, just before I sat down to write this for the newsletter!

I was coming back from a road trip with my boyfriend last week, when we decided to put on a music playlist I’m working on; my “Top 100”, or subjectively, my personal favorite Top 100 favorite songs of all time. Not only was it a wonderful background playlist to our drive (although it isn’t complete, with only 40 songs so far!) but as we were listening to “Across the Universe,” by the Beatles, I had a wonderful memory of the first time I heard the song.

I was seven years old and on the way to the Baltimore Aquarium (for the first time!) for a school field trip. My dad was driving me there because I went to a small school, and as a music-holic, he never really drove me anywhere without having some great tunes on for the ride, usually oldies, and especially The Beatles! The Blair children had been raised on the Beatles, even in the womb (lol!) so I was pretty well-versed in a lot of Beatles music, but I was also at the age I could ask about song meaning, song titles, albums, etc. and wanted to know more and memorize more about the message behind different songs and how it all worked, what it all meant.

I remember the swirling guitar immediately captivating me in the song’s intro – as if, no pun intended, I was transported instantly to some different Universe, where everything was echoing, floating and mesmerizing. I was already able to tell the difference between the Beatles’ voices, so I listened as John Lennon wove wonderful poetry about some things that went over my head, and about some I seemed to immediately understand in my heart. The chorus, in particular, “Nothing’s gonna change my world,” really hit home, even at that young age. I had a new sibling that was to be born soon, which would make me the eldest sibling of three younger ones, and we were about to move to a new home in the country with a bigger house to hold all of us. A new school, a new routine, a new family dynamic, may not sound like a lot to an adult, but as a kid I never did well with change, and I was pretty apprehensive and scared. As those lyrics continued to repeat, I suddenly just latched onto them as a safe place to be – I didn’t know the word “mantra”, at that age, but when I did learn the word as I got older I thought, “Oh, yes – like my line from Across the Universe!” I even had a leadership class in high school, in which we were instructed to bring in a song to play for the class and explain why it was our “mantra” or “theme song,” and I was so happy to share the memory with the class of little Ginny and how “Nothing’s gonna change my world,” was still something I lived by, day to day.

So, what exactly did that phase mean to me, then, or what does it mean to me, now? When I was small, I resonated with the idea that I really knew who I was, and I was determined to be my unique self, and to be happy, no matter what was happening in life, or as I grew up and changed. As an adult, it means quite close to the same thing. As the saying goes, “let your smile change the world, but don’t let the world change your smile.” Life can be so heavy and so much to handle sometimes, and in those moments, it can be hard to remember who we are. Another line from the song I’ve always loved is “pools of sorrow, waves of joy are drifting through my opened mind, possessing and caressing me.” Life can feel like that sometimes, too . . . as humans we have a psychological negativity bias, meaning, we tend to overattribute and identify with negative life events, circumstances, situations, memories, etc., so that we feel negative things happen more often than positive ones. And while that’s true and may skew our perspective sometimes, in some periods of life we can experience just plain bad luck, or, we are going through a period of self-transformation where things can be dark and uncertain, or even still, there are times we simply made a mistake and are sifting through the icky mire of the consequences of our actions, and in those times the “pools of sorrow,” can indeed feel overwhelming.

Whatever the case may be when we are experiencing “pools of sorrow”, the “waves of joy”, in life, must be our imperative focus. We must learn how to be resilient, no matter the circumstances, if we want to have a life that is more than mediocre, or more than miserable, even. We are certainly all handed a different set of cards in this life, but if you are interested in self-betterment, and self-improvement, you have probably read dozens or hundreds of stories of people who were able to be resilient despite the odds. The story of football player, Warrick Dunn, in Pat’s article on page 2 of this newsletter is a beautiful example, but there are countless other stories like his in which the hero was able to rise above, even to great success, despite seemingly impossible odds.

But the how is always harder to answer than the what, isn’t it? How does one cultivate the tools to be consistently resilient, to rise above? Of one thing I am certain in 33 years of life so far – there is no singular, good answer. I will start by saying, as a yoga teacher and fitness proponent, taking care of your physical and mental health is paramount. We must care about each of these as if we had no other job. Without physical and mental health, resilience can be nearly impossible. When we don’t feel physically well, or we don’t have good control over the tricky narratives our minds can make up for us, it’s very difficult to take any steps toward self-betterment, self-preservation or resilience.

Beyond that, the list is truly endless, and it’s different for different people, as people find great inspiration, support and resilience in my different ways. Some seek solace in religion or philosophy. Others find art, whether it be music, painting, dancing, etc. to be a place where they can heal and restore. Others may find great joy in participating in solo or team sports, a place where they can build endurance that helps them understand that they can endure the challenges of life, too. Some people read or write, finding comfort in stories and the endless places a fiction story can take you, or ideas that a non-fiction story can teach you. There is gardening, getting outdoors, hiking, mountain biking, cooking, volunteer work spending time with your family, enjoying the holidays fully throughout the year, remembering to appreciate all of the little things, to stop and smell the roses . . .

But how, exactly, do all of these little things connect to resilience, you might ask? I saw something online talking recently about “glimmers”, in life – small, positive moments that bring feelings of joy, peace, or hope (like the opposite of a “trigger” in a trauma situation.) We all have different glimmers, but in my experience, the more glimmers you can fill your life with, the better chance you stand of being resilient in life, despite even your own self-doubt. The more you can fill your life with “glimmers,” all around you, the greater the “waves of joy,” seem to be, whether anything foundational has changed, or not. Identify your glimmers, add as many as you can to your running list, and do your best to be present in every possible moment so that you rarely ever let one pass you by. Certainly something that is easier said than done, but still entirely accessible and achievable by any human in any stage of walk of life.

If this resonates, with you, I’d love to hear your feedback! Shoot me a note and we can discuss via email, or I’d be happy to grab a cup of coffee or a lunch and discuss more. For now, I’ll leave you with a final aphorism that I often hearken back to from English philosopher Bernard Williams; “Man never made any material as resilient as the human spirit.” May you find great resiliency in this final quarter of the year, all, and most of all, please know if you ever need support, a helping hand, etc., I would be more than happy to chat with you as a human, as a friend, and Cornerstone Defense supports that sentiment, whole-heartedly. We are always here to support you – thank you for everything you do for our team. We appreciate you more than you know!

Oh, and here’s the Beatles song if you’d like to hear it, “Across the Universe!” I hope you find it as inspiring as I do! YouTube, The Beatles, “Across the Universe” 🔗🔗🔗